We can feel abandoned in different ways. I have learned first of all, it’s a feeling, and it will pass!
A feeling could come when you least expect it but it always has a source. Leaving a course of action, emotionally, physically or in a way of thinking. Many things can trigger this feeling. It could be the loss of a pet, child, parent, house, marriage, loss of a job, loss of freedom. We can make ourselves believe this feeling will stay inside every time something leaves or rejects us. It makes us feel vulnerable, empty, sad and at a loss. If we can breathe and recognize when this feeling comes, we can stop needing to be depended on belonging to things, or someone, and start trusting ourselves and feeling peace within ourselves instead.
It’s easy to think the reason we get rejected and feel abandoned has to do with us, or something we did, but we have to remember, many times it has nothing to do with us. It’s also easy to dwell on why someone left us or decided they don’t want to be in our lives anymore. That’s just a waste of your precious energy and time and you are also abandoning yourself staying in those thoughts.
I had the ultimate feeling of rejection and abandonment when my mom decided to no longer continue living in this beautiful world. It was and still triggers me at certain times. I’m now very aware of it when it comes and I no longer hang onto the feeling and the illusion of believing it has anything to do with me. And again, the feeling will pass.
I also have thought of abandonment in a different way. The things in life that leave us or reject us were not meant for us, no matter what it is, and I believe things always happen for a reason, whatever that reason is. It also teaches us about ourselves which we should be very grateful for. Even my mom's death I believe happened for a reason..it had a purpose and a meaning to both her and the people she loved. Also she didn’t really leave us, she left herself, and it was her choice, so if we decide to live in the illusion of feeling abandoned we only do ourselves a disservice. We can get angry, and believe me I have been, but that really doesn’t benefit us or the beautiful, precious world we live in. It also prevents us from giving our true selves, and taking away our journey to give the most to this world and living in the present. Every time we go back to the past we abandon our goals, our life, and the possibilities of the future. We know ourselves the best, and maybe it was the best decision for my mom to leave. I probably would have lived a very different life if she had been in it. So, instead of believing the feelings, let’s stop abandoning ourselves and start living this life at this moment!
Today’s Assignment:
When you have the feeling of abandonment try to think of when was the last time you felt that way in your past. Then ask yourself,
- In this current situation, am I really abandoned? Or was it just an old feeling that automatically slipped into this current situation? Breathe, and let it go.
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